Does anyone else wish they could manipulate love? Manipulate the love in such a way so that the one being pursued loves us back? Maybe manipulate is too strong of a word. Too many bad thoughts surface when the word manipulate is used. Maybe shift, shape or mold would be better words to use.
I want to shift someone’s love. Shape it so they love me instead. Mold it into something beautiful. Something that involves me, not her.
I know that it’s a sin to try and steal someone away from to another. To covet them. To be adulterous. That’s not what I want, not at all. I want him to realize that he and I would be the perfect combination. A pair of souls that unite so wholly that we always feel as one.
I have little moments with him that verify my feelings completely. Take last night for example. We were both at the same event and gravitated toward each other. He came late and had no spot to sit so naturally, I offered him a place at my table and he accepted. The night was spent flirting, laughing, smiling. Seemingly like a couple yet so far away from that dream. After the event was over, we spoke on the phone and he invited me to a party. We had fun while he was their but then we parted again. I saw him at the end of the night again, though, before we both went home. We sat outside and had a nice talk and afterward we hugged. It was too close and emotional for a friend’s hug. As he pulled me close to his body he cradled my head in his hand, fingers combed through my hair. I melted.
It’s just so hard for me to feel something so real and true and have it not within my reach. I don’t know what to do. If anyone out there in the Universe has any advice or comments I would appreciate it.
Stuck in love with someone who’s unavailable. Classic.
What do I do now?